17 Jan Letting Go of The Fantasy
Do you get frustrated that you haven’t achieved what you wanted to achieve, that your fitness isn’t what it should be, that your boss or partner doesn’t treat you right, that you’ve made some bad choices in the past – in short, that you, other people and circumstances don’t live up to your fantasy of how you wish that they should be? Draining isn’t it?
And how much does that frustration and wishful thinking actually change things? Well, it can spur on our determination to try to do something about it, but often we still find ourselves with a big gap between fantasy and reality. And we waste so much of our energy being frustrated by that gap.
But the truth is, we are where we are, it is how it is right now. No amount of wishful thinking or frustration will change that fact. The sooner we are able to simply accept the reality of our circumstances, the sooner we are able to apply our energy and attention to take the next step to take us from where we are now, to where we want to be. We have to start our journey from where we actually are, not from where we wish we were!
Acceptance does not mean giving up, settling for less, or condoning something that is wrong. Acceptance means we deal with reality and make a choice about how to respond to that reality in the moment. It means we make choices about what we can control, and then simply let go of the rest, because to do otherwise brings us only stress, fatigue and a sense of powerlessness. Paradoxically, it’s only by letting go of the fantasy, and dealing with reality, that we’ll find the energy and strength to make our dreams come true.
What fantasies have you been holding on to?